sweet succulents

Welcome to our home, Ms. Agave Victoria Regina!

And crassula falcata and aeonium arboreum swarzkop and sedum dasyphyllum and senecio mandraliscae and senecio anteuphorbium and some red sort of echeveria.

Last week, Coach and I went to World Wide Exotics, an incredible nursery way out where the 210 meets the 5. They specialize in drought-tolerant plants–meaning ones that are hard to kill!!! (Or so I hope.)

Plus, they look really neat: Vicky looks like a really dangerous artichoke. And one of those senecios looks kind of like asparagus. I’m so excited, I also bought about a million pots. Hey Coach, wide five!

snookie in a snit

She just hates getting her picture taken. Pobrecita.

Plus, it looks like the only thing she got from me was her posture. (Well, that and her even temper.) Oh shoot!

the remains of the day

After enjoying a nice, large chocolate chip cookie, here’s what I have left: an empty milk carton and a small pile of chips. Coach thinks there’s something wrong with this picture. But it makes perfect sense to me…

holy shit

Acknowledgments: Thanks to the Lady H letting us know about interesting piece of literature–and for the very apt title of this post.

In the tradition of the Twilight saga, comes this:

Give up, Stephenie Meyer–and Jaccquelyn Frank and Jayne Ann Krentz writing as Jayne Castle. This is the love story to end all supernatural love stories. So what makes it so great? I really can’t top what they’ve got on the back cover, so let’s just let them explain.

About three things you can be absolutely positive: First, every girl longs to be loved with a vast and endless passion. Second, there is a fiercely protective Immortal Hero who longs for your heart. And third, He loves you with an unconditional and irrevocable love.

This epic love story—one even greater than the story of Bella and Edward—has already been written, with you in mind as the beautiful heroine. Only this is no fantasy. You can live your life eternally with the Immortal Hero who cherishes everything about you, protects you, and loves you more deeply than you could ever imagine.

Yes, you guessed it (those caps were quite the tip-off): Our “Hero” (sic) is Jesus H. Christ. My god! They let young girls read this racy stuff?! For shame!

smooth operator

Hey Baker, see that? I love PUNS too!

And I love coach’s gift, this immersion blender:

Today, it saved me from making a trip to Dave’s Chillin-n-Grillin, which, in addition to excellent smoothies, has sandwiches made from deli cold cuts (even the French dip!). Eww.

But I do love those smoothies. And now thanks to my new blender, I can make them right at home and right in the cup! How awesome is that?

Berry Smoothie
Place apple juice, frozen mixed berries (including blueberries!), and raspberry sorbet in cup. Blend with immersion blender until smooth. If the mixture’s too thick, add more juice. If it’s too sour, add more sorbet. Too sweet? More berries. That’s it. Yum!

i love connectivity

It’s true: I’m now on Facebook. Who am I anymore???

the competition

I haven’t been writing–I’ve been too busy baking this

oatmeal bread

and this

whole wheat walnut loaf

and this

dried cherry scone

Nice! Here at HeyChickens we’ve got so many good breakfast options! So what did coach choose??? (Drum roll, please.) He ate this

freakin' fancy loaf

The neighbor’s bread!

“Hey Coach, thanks for shoveling away that possum. Try my fancy friggin’ bread.”

Oh yes, it’s true: I am not the big winner. While I’ve been trifling with quick breads and sandwich loaves, our neighbor has mastered hearth breads!!! And oh man, does it hurt.

what was i thinking?

Watching this movie was a big mistake.

big mistake

Its English title is Samaritan Girl, and it’s about this Korean schoolgirl (right) who acts as a pimp for her best friend (left). I’m sure you’re already thinking what was I thinking, but Netflix thought I would like it, I think. Anyway, these two are a bunch of amateurs. The pimp is reluctant, but the prostitute is (disturbingly) eager. It’s all just fun and games (for her, anyway) until this happens:

The pimp is also the lookout. But one day she misses the cops, who corner the prostitute in a second-story motel room. The prostitute escapes out the window(?!). And although the main character looks away, we still hear a sickening splat. The reaction shot is a look of horror; the camera pans to show her beloved friend, whose head hit the pavement. Even worse, she’s still alive! They escape (as shown) and make it to a hospital. But still, the prostitute dies, alone and confused.

Awesome movie! And yet, I keep watching.

To redeem her friend, the main character goes on a mission: She’ll meet the johns and give them back their money(?!). But it soon becomes apparent that what she’ll really do is screw them all. (Literally, that is.)

This is when I turn it off and go eat my lunch.

Luckily, this YouTube video filled me in on the rest: She does sleep with all the johns. And her very sweet, single father (who happens to be a detective) finds out. He kills one (or all?) of the men. Then he kills her. The end.

Can’t wait to watch this gem? See it instantly on Netflix. It’s free with a monthly membership!

playing possum

yet another victim?

When Daniel…er coach…no, I mean the coroner showed me this body, I thought for sure our killer had struck again. Turns out this possum was just playing! And that crazy hairdo? Courtesy of Sophia the pitbill. Nice!

From here, it was a quick shovel-ride to the hills below the 134. Happy trails, Possum!

day is done

Nine thirty on a Thursday evening and here’s what it looks like in my house:

Even pony’s asleep!

Is it just me–or does this happen to you?